The busy and noisy world in which we live causes us to raise our voice. Sometimes it is an attempt to be heard. Other times it is a calculated approach to gain control or power over a situation or someone. When it happens, we must prevent the moment from causing us to forget what matters most.

Unfortunately, I recently fell prey to this type of momentary forgetfulness.

On a phone call with one of my team’s core leaders, the conversation escalated and my voice was raised.

At that moment, nothing else seemed to matter except the point that I wanted to make.

It wasn’t until after I hung up and reflected on the conversation that I realized I had lost my way.

It could have been forgetful. It might have been an unintentional abandonment of my core values. Regardless, my raised voice tried to create a situation that mattered more than it really did.

Only it didn’t.

What mattered most in that situation was the opportunity to coach and service one of our leaders.

Yet instead of taking advantage of this opportunity, I squandered it.

Conversations like this happen.

They happen at work, at home and everywhere else. Often times, they happen with those that we love the most.

There are times we are triggered by something that causes us to seemingly lose our mind and emotions.

It happens because we’re humans filled with baggage and weighed down by the pressures of life in the 21st century.

And if we’re being honest, it likely happens more than we care to admit.

Yelling at your daughter as she is about to step onto a busy street makes sense. Because at that moment, her safety is what matters the most.

Raising your voice at a friend, loved one or co-worker rarely comes with a justifiable excuse to do so.

Most voice raises have little to do with what is meaningful.

The next time that you feel the urge to yell, try to make sure that it is truly needed. 

Most importantly, make sure that raising your voice matters at that moment.